Media personality Simi Sanya says her husband knew she could only prepare a few meals before they got married and has never complained, but writer Chisom insists that publicising such an arrangement invites unnecessary criticism. The exchange has evolved into a wider debate on honesty in relationships, domestic responsibilities and the changing expectations of marriage in modern Nigeria.

 

In July, 2026, a seemingly casual remark made during an interview has developed into one of the most widely discussed relationship conversations on Nigerian social media. What started as a personal reflection on marriage has grown into a national debate about cooking, gender expectations, honesty between couples and the realities of modern family life.

Media personality and lifestyle influencer Simi Sanya found herself at the centre of public attention after revealing that she only knows how to prepare a handful of meals including spaghetti, yam and eggs and that her husband has happily accepted this since the beginning of their relationship.

Her comments immediately generated thousands of reactions across X (formerly Twitter), Facebook, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube. While many Nigerians applauded her honesty and the understanding between her and her husband, others questioned whether she was normalising what they considered a lack of an essential life skill.

The conversation took a new turn when Nigerian writer Chisom publicly criticised Sanya, accusing her of unnecessarily exposing her husband to online criticism.

“Stop setting your husband up for drags. Go learn how to cook and enjoy your marriage quietly,” Chisom wrote.

Within hours, her comment had been widely shared, reposted and debated, transforming what was initially a personal opinion into a broader discussion about the responsibilities of husbands and wives in contemporary society.

 

How the Conversation Began

Simi Sanya made the now-viral remarks during an interview where she discussed relationships, dating and marriage. Speaking candidly, she argued that many relationships suffer because people pretend to be someone they are not during courtship, only for their true personalities to emerge after marriage.

According to her, she deliberately chose honesty from the very beginning of her relationship. Rather than pretending to enjoy cooking simply to impress her future husband, she openly admitted that preparing meals was never one of her strongest skills.

She explained that this transparency helped establish realistic expectations long before wedding plans began.

According to Sanya, compatibility is not built on pretending to satisfy societal expectations but on allowing one’s partner to make informed decisions based on the truth.

She maintained that her husband entered the marriage fully aware of her strengths and limitations and therefore had no reason to complain afterward.

 

Simi Sanya Speaks

During the interview, Sanya defended her position without apology.

She said:

“I only know how to cook spaghetti, yam and eggs, and my husband doesn’t mind.”

She continued by explaining that her husband had known this throughout their courtship.

“He knew before we got married. I never deceived him into believing I was someone else.”

She argued that many people create unnecessary conflict by trying to impress their partners with temporary behaviours that cannot be sustained after marriage.

According to Sanya, pretending to be an excellent cook simply to secure marriage would have amounted to dishonesty.

She also questioned why marriage should suddenly require someone to abandon the person they had always been.

“You saw me before marriage. You knew exactly who I was. Why should I suddenly become someone else because we’re married?”

To Sanya, marriage should not be about forcing people into traditional roles they never accepted. Instead, she believes it should be built on communication, mutual understanding and acceptance.

She further argued that every successful marriage develops its own system based on the personalities, strengths and agreements of the couple involved rather than on public opinion.

 

Chisom’s Response Sparks Another Wave of Debate

Although many people viewed Sanya’s comments as harmless, writer Chisom strongly disagreed.

In a direct response that quickly circulated online, she wrote:

“Stop setting your husband up for drags. Go learn how to cook and enjoy your marriage quietly.”

Her response suggested that the issue extended beyond cooking itself.

According to many of her supporters, repeatedly discussing one’s inability to cook risks turning a private marital understanding into a public spectacle.

Supporters argued that while Simi’s husband may genuinely have no objection, continually making the subject part of public interviews inevitably exposes him to criticism, jokes and ridicule from strangers.

Others interpreted Chisom’s statement as encouragement for continuous personal growth, arguing that marriage should inspire individuals to develop new skills instead of celebrating their limitations.

For this group, learning to cook is not about submitting to outdated gender stereotypes but about becoming a more resourceful adult capable of caring for oneself and one’s family.

 

Look On Influencer Simi Sanya’s Marriage

Simi Sanya’s marriage has frequently attracted public attention because of the openness with which she discusses relationships and married life. She is married to Femi Dapson, a Nigerian filmmaker and music video director. Their relationship became public before they tied the knot, and the couple have often presented themselves as partners who value honesty, friendship and mutual understanding.

According to Simi, one of the foundations of their marriage is transparency. She has repeatedly stated that she never pretended to possess qualities she did not have while they were dating. Speaking about her recent cooking revelation, she maintained that her husband knew her limited cooking abilities before marriage and willingly accepted her for who she was.

She believes this mutual understanding has prevented unnecessary conflicts in their home and demonstrates that every successful marriage is built on agreements made by the couple rather than by societal expectations.

 

The Couple’s Profiles

Nigeria Celebrity Simi Sanya

Simi Sanya is a Nigerian media personality, digital content creator and lifestyle influencer known for discussing relationships, marriage, personal growth and social issues. Through interviews and social media platforms, she shares opinions on modern relationships, often encouraging honesty, communication and authenticity among couples. Her straightforward style has earned her both loyal supporters and critics.

 

Filmmaker Femi Dapson

Femi Dapson is a Nigerian filmmaker and award-winning music video director. He has worked with several notable Nigerian musicians and is recognised for his contributions to the country’s entertainment industry.

Although he maintains a relatively private personal life, he has publicly supported his wife and is often described as a calm and supportive partner. Their marriage is frequently cited by Simi as an example of mutual understanding and acceptance.

 

Profile of Writer Chisom

Writer Chisom is a Nigerian author, social commentator and online writer known for expressing strong opinions on relationships, marriage, family values and personal development. Her commentaries often encourage discipline, continuous self-improvement and responsibility in marriage.

Through her writings and social media posts, she contributes to public discussions on contemporary issues affecting families and young adults. Her criticism of Simi Sanya reflects her belief that marriage should inspire individuals to improve themselves while keeping private family matters away from unnecessary public attention.

 

Public Support for Simi Sanya

Many Nigerians defended Simi Sanya, arguing that every marriage is unique and should be respected if both partners are satisfied with their arrangement.

Some of the reactions included:

“She never deceived her husband. He knew exactly who she was before they got married, and that’s what honesty in marriage is all about.”

“People should stop forcing traditional expectations on every woman. If her husband is happy, outsiders shouldn’t be offended.”

“Marriage is an agreement between two adults, not between a couple and social media.”

“Cooking is a useful skill, but it should not be the only measure of a woman’s value or success as a wife.”

“The most important thing is communication. They discussed it before marriage and reached an understanding.”

Supporters also argued that household responsibilities should be shared based on mutual agreement rather than societal pressure.

 

Public Support for Writer Chisom

Many social media users agreed with Chisom’s position, saying her comments promoted responsibility and self-development.

 

Some reactions included:

“There is absolutely nothing wrong with learning how to cook after marriage.”

“Cooking is a basic life skill that benefits everyone, whether male or female.”

“Marriage should encourage people to grow instead of celebrating their weaknesses.”

“Her husband may not complain, but learning new skills can only strengthen the marriage.”

“Private family arrangements don’t always need to become public conversations.”

Supporters believed Chisom’s advice was constructive rather than insulting and that it encouraged continuous personal improvement.

 

Public Criticism of Simi Sanya

Not everyone was convinced by Simi Sanya’s explanation. Some Nigerians criticised her remarks, arguing that they sent the wrong message to young women preparing for marriage.

Among the comments were:

“Being honest is good, but honesty shouldn’t stop someone from improving themselves.”

“Knowing how to cook is an important life skill, not a punishment.”

“She keeps talking about this issue as though it is something to celebrate.”

“Marriage requires effort from both husband and wife. Learning to cook is one way of contributing to the family.”

“No one is asking her to become a professional chef, but every adult should know how to prepare a variety of meals.”

Others argued that public figures should be mindful of the messages they communicate because many young people look to them as role models.

 

In summary, the exchange between Simi Sanya and writer Chisom has grown beyond a simple discussion about cooking into a broader conversation about honesty, personal growth, gender roles and the evolving nature of marriage in Nigeria. While Simi Sanya maintains that openness before marriage allowed her husband to make an informed choice and accept her as she is, Chisom believes that marriage should also encourage self-improvement and greater discretion when discussing private family matters in public.

The diverse public reactions demonstrate that there is no universal model for a successful marriage. Some people prioritise transparency and mutual agreement, while others place greater emphasis on acquiring practical life skills and fulfilling traditional family responsibilities. Ultimately, the debate highlights the importance of communication, respect and shared understanding between spouses. Every marriage operates differently, and lasting relationships are often built not on public opinion but on the commitments, compromises and values agreed upon by the couple themselves.

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